Do you know someone who makes you feel like you’re going crazy? Someone who twists your words and makes you doubt your own sanity? If so, then you may be a victim of gaslighting. Gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse that causes victims to question their own thoughts, feelings, and memories. It can be very insidious, because the abuser usually manages to make themselves look like the “victim” in the situation. That’s why it’s important to learn about gaslighting and how to protect yourself from it. In this article, we will share 100 quotes about gaslighting to help you recognize this type of abuse when it happens to you or someone you love.
Whether you need a reminder of why gaslighting is wrong or simply want to understand it better, these quotes will help.
Gaslighting Quotes
- “heroes don’t haunt so what did that make you” – Laura Gentile
- “Gaslighting is a distorted alternate reality.” – Tracy Malone
- “Gaslighting is an attempt to change the truth.” – Tracy Malone
- “Lies don’t end relationships the truth does.” – Shannon L. Alder
- “Gaslighting is a slow unconscious loss of reality.” – Tracy Malone
- “Gaslighting is implanted narratives cloaked in secrecy.” – Tracy Malone
- “It took me years, to make sense of my childhood.” – Efrat Cybulkiewicz,
- “Gaslighting are lies with a purpose to confuse and control.” – Tracy Malone
- “You took advantage of every second that I did not love myself.” – Laura Gentile
- “Sometimes you have to choose between being lonely and being crazy.” – Anonymous
- “Gaslighting is mind control to make victims doubt their reality.” – Tracy Malone
- “The company was engaging in gaslighting at the Desoto Solar Farm.” – Steven Magee
- “Gaslighting is when you don’t remember things the same as they do.” – Tracy Malone
- “Why drink from another’s well? When you have your own Inner-ocean?” – Jallaludin Rumi
- “Gaslighting is confusing because they switch to intermittent concern.” – Tracy Malone
- “i have bruises no one can see i am hurting but i’ll just smile” – R.H. Sin, Algedonic
- “Conspiracy theories of the feeble or gaslighting of the twisted.” – Et Imperatrix Noctem
- “Driving someone to insanity is the devil’s work.” – E.A. Bucchianeri, Vocation of a Gadfly
- “l lived the life of a lunatic, seeing sunshine, I suspected rain” – Tara Westover, Educated
- “You are being abused if you find yourself apologizing when you didn’t do anything.” – Tracy A. Malone
- “You just need to be convincing enough to fool the public. That’s easy.” – Sol Luckman, Cali the Destroyer
- “Somebody tells you the truth, and you call it raving.” – Vincent H. O’Neil, A Pause in the Perpetual Rotation
- “I held truth against your crocodile tears.” – Laura Gentile, Daughterbody II: a self-reclamation through poetry
- “If you didn’t exist, I wouldn’t exist. Everything I’ve done is because of you!” – D.J. MacHale, The Quillan Games
- “You built a house and filled it with death images” – Laura Gentile, Daughterbody I: a self-exorcism through poetry
- “Stuck in a fetal position I sought out my lovers.” – Laura Gentile, Daughterbody II: a self-reclamation through poetry
- “Remember, a fact is a fact, no matter how hard the liars amongst you might try hushing it up.” – Billy Childish, My Fault
- “And I wanted to hold your face in my hands and scream.” – Laura Gentile, Daughterbody II: a self-reclamation through poetry
- “You don’t spill your lies on the pages that I write on.” – Laura Gentile, Daughterbody II: a self-reclamation through poetry
- “he uses my body to make his dream come true” – Laura Gentile, you ate popcorn in my house of grief: transgenerational poetry
- “she feels alive when she infects your wounds” – Laura Gentile, you ate popcorn in my house of grief: transgenerational poetry
- “If you alter your behaviour because you are frightened of how your partner will react, you are being abused.” – Sandra Horley
- “she is so empty inside she’ll devour you whole” – Laura Gentile, you ate popcorn in my house of grief: transgenerational poetry
- “she talks about her soul but her eyes are blank” – Laura Gentile, you ate popcorn in my house of grief: transgenerational poetry
- “he wants my body to function not my soul to live” – Laura Gentile, you ate popcorn in my house of grief: transgenerational poetry
- “I forced you out of myself and never said goodbye” – Laura Gentile, you ate popcorn in my house of grief: transgenerational poetry
- “Changed behavior is the only apology, otherwise, it’s just manipulation.” – Maranda Pleasant, Origin: Music, Art, Yoga Consciousness
- “brain fart: (n.) noxious gas emitted when mainstream journalists commit their thoughts to paper.” – Sol Luckman, The Angel’s Dictionary
- “Some people will label you as vindictive, unforgiving or even evil for not allowing them to hurt you, yet again.” – Wayne Gerard Trotman
- “Lies require noise and misdirection to blend in, silence is the best way to draw the truth to the surface.” – Anna Pitoniak, Necessary People
- “Andrew was right. We probably wouldn’t have any problems if I didn’t go out of my way to create them.” – Alicia Thompson, Psych Major Syndrome
- “Here comes the gaslighting. He’s attempting to make me feel crazy for being scared, even though my fear is more than warranted.” – Colleen Hoover
- “what they think about the most never makes it out of their mouths” – Laura Gentile, you ate popcorn in my house of grief: transgenerational poetry
- “It starts with a lie. Each day the lies amplify. Time goes by, the lies turn to gaslighting. Eventually the lies become smears about you.” – Tracy A. Malone
- “You love someone. You don’t leave her to drown. And you don’t tell her she’s crazier than she already knows that she is!” – Caitlín R. Kiernan, The Drowning Girl
- “Quitters always believe the lies they tell themselves because delusion is easier to live with than the reality that they settled for an easier path.” – Shannon L. Alder
- “Toxic shame is a body flashback to the moment someone hurt you badly and gaslighted you into believing it was okay or well-earned.” – Remy Alberi, The Comprehension Watch
- “You are blessed and cursed with consciousness, my child, in a society that has done everything imaginable to remove your kind from its gene pool.” – Sol Luckman, Cali the Destroyer
- “Everyone loses their class when they travel through hell, but only a few will regain it if they remain humble and accept the part they played in their own misery.” – Shannon L. Alder
- “All you had to do was line up events as though they had happened in linear fashion and let the crowds draw what they thought was their own conclusion.” – Cassondra Windwalker, Bury The Lead
- “Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation and emotional abuse that makes victims question their own sanity, perception of reality, memories or beliefs.” – Unknown
- “Gaslighting is the process of an abuser changing information or giving contradictory information with the intent to make their victim doubt themselves and the truth.” – Unknown
- “Gaslighting is a tactic of manipulation and control. It is an insidious form of emotional abuse that makes a victim question their own reality, identity, and worth.” – Dr. Ramani Durvasula
- “Gaslighting is a cruel form of mental abuse in which the abuser manipulates information to make their victims doubt themselves and trust them instead.” – Unknown
- “Gaslighting is a tactic of psychological abuse where false information is presented to the victim with the intent to make them doubt their memory, perception, and reality.” – Unknown
- “Gaslighting is a form of manipulation that seeks to sow seeds of doubt in a targeted individual or in members of a targeted group, hoping to make them question their own memory, perception, and sanity.” – Unknown
- “You’re a grown man now, Nathan. I’m sorry for any problems you have, but part of being an adult is to stop blaming your parents for whatever shortcomings you have. That’s pretty basic.” – Noah Van Sciver
- “If you are mad right now, good. Use your emotions as fuel to write down everything now.” – Christy Piper, Girl, You Deserve More: How to Break His Spell over You, Escape Your Toxic Partner, and Become Independent
- “I felt like what he said was a thin cloth he held over what he meant, letting me see its shadow or its shape protruding. If I pushed at the veil, the mystery under the surface would poke out.” – Lucie Elven, The Weak Spot
- “The mirror and I are having an insane talk. That’s what they call you for escaping. And you will happily accept this label because it is always opposite day with the narcissist.” – Casey Renee Kiser, Escape from Narc Island
- “People who harm you will blame you for it. Remember, an abuser will generally always play the victim, spin a story, tell everyone and they generally call you crazy.” – Maranda Pleasant, Origin: Music, Art, Yoga Consciousness
- “I didn’t condemn you,” he defended himself. “I was just surprised. I’ve a right to be shocked. It’s not what one expects of a Trader’s daughter. But that doesn’t mean I…” ‘F*** you, Wintrow,’ she retaliated savagely.” – Robin Hobb
- “If I say, “I have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome,” I’m likely to be discredited as a witness to my own condition. I’ve had doctors tell me there’s no such thing as Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. One doctor said: “Just drink some coffee.” – Toni Bernhard
- “The secret to healing is when you learn that had the power all along. The brainwashing fades and the fears retreat as you rebuild and create the happiest you. Be strong and fight for the future of drinking lemonade in peace.” – Tracy A. Malone
- “so often victims end up unnecessarily prolonging their abuse because they buy into the notion that their abuser must be coming from a wounded place and that only patient love and tolerance (and lots of misguided therapy) will help them heal.” – George K. Simon
- “I have just this one heart okay I was burned I was gaslit nearly to ash on the first try From the start I was told I was a powerful speaker I was told when & how I should speak It’s true I made a feast of my own misery I invited everyone the whole gang” – Emily Skaja, Brute: Poems
- “Let us not get scooped up by gaslighting manipulators stealing our emotions and taking possession of our inner child to carry out their dark agenda. Let the light of our intuition guide us subtly and wisely along the path of trust and suspicion. (“Juicy rumors”)” – Erik Pevernagie
- “Remember, someone that does something bad to you, will always try to control the narrative, and they generally get out there first and spin the story to anyone who will listen. I always like to watch the quiet one. You are not alone.” – maranda pleasant, Origin: Music, Art, Yoga Consciousness
- “Emotional abuse is designed to undermine another’s sense of self. It is deliberate humiliation, with the intent to seize control of how others feel about themselves.” – Lorraine Nilon, Breaking Free From the Chains of Silence: A respectful exploration into the ramifications of Paedophilic abuse
- “Gaslighting qualifies as a form of emotional abuse that involves denying a person’s experience and making statements, such as “that never happened,” “you’re too sensitive,” or “this isn’t that big a deal.” – Ramani Durvasula, Should I Stay or Should I Go?: Surviving a Relationship with a Narcissist
- “If you have trouble withholding personal information from nosy questioners, you need to get over this. This is how abusers take advantage of you in relationships and in life.” – Christy Piper, Girl, You Deserve More: How to Break His Spell over You, Escape Your Toxic Partner, and Become Independent
- “invalidation is crazy-making, and it is also at the root of gaslighting, where victims’ feelings are purposely denied or manipulated in order to make them question their sanity.” – Samantha Rodman, How to Talk to Your Kids about Your Divorce: Healthy, Effective Communication Techniques for Your Changing Family
- “Gaslighting causes us to doubt our own memories, perceptions, and judgments. It throws us psychologically off balance. It’s like being in the Twilight Zone. If you feel as though your self-esteem, confidence, and dignity has withered under the flame of gaslighting, you are not alone.” – Dana Arcuri, Certified Trauma Recovery Coach
- “Emotional abuse can leave a victim feeling like a shell of a person, separated from the true essence of who they naturally are. It also leads to a victim feeling tormented and tortured by their own emotions.” – Lorraine Nilon, Breaking Free From the Chains of Silence: A respectful exploration into the ramifications of Paedophilic abuse
- “This term is used in the 1944 Ingrid Bergman film Gaslight, in which a husband purposefully drives his wife insane by flickering lights, making noises in the attic, and then claiming the very real experience was all in her head.” – Samantha Rodman, How to Talk to Your Kids about Your Divorce: Healthy, Effective Communication Techniques for Your Changing Family
- “Remember: As long as there’s any part of yourself that believes you need your gaslighter to feel better about yourself, to boost your confidence, or to bolster your sense of who you are in the world, you’ll be leaving yourself open for gaslighting.” – Robin Stern, The Gaslight Effect: How to Spot and Survive the Hidden Manipulation Others Use to Control Your Life
- “Selective amnesia by harmful people is blame-shifting. According to FreeDictionary.com, “Blame-shifting is when someone shifts the blame from person to person.” The root of blame-shifting is when an abusive person fails to take responsibility for their cruelty.” – Dana Arcuri, Certified Trauma Recovery Coach, Soul Rescue: How to Break Free From Narcissistic Abuse & Heal Trauma
- “Gaslighting is a subtle form of emotional manipulation that often results in the recipient doubting their own perception of reality and their sanity. In addition, gaslighting is a method of manipulation by toxic people to gain power over you. The worst part about gaslighting is that it undermines your self-worth to the point where you’re second-guessing everything.” – Dana Arcuri
- “Playing the victim role: Manipulator portrays him- or herself as a victim of circumstance or of someone else’s behavior in order to gain pity, sympathy or evoke compassion and thereby get something from another. Caring and conscientious people cannot stand to see anyone suffering and the manipulator often finds it easy to play on sympathy to get cooperation.” – George K. Simon Jr.
- “Some men told me they wished someone would sexually harass them, because they seemed to be unable to imagine it as anything but pleasant invitations from attractive people. No one was offering the help of recognizing what I was experiencing or agreeing that I had the right to be safe and free. It was a kind of collective gaslighting.” – Rebecca Solnit, Recollections of My Nonexistence: A Memoir
- “Were you blamed for their cheating? They choose to cheat, they choose to hide it, they choose to lie. All of these are a sign of a selfish, lying cheat who is so weak to not take any responsibility for their actions. To prove themselves even lower than pond scum, they add insult to injury by blaming you! Unless you drove them on the date, this is not your fault. It’s gaslighting. Run!” – Tracy A. Malone
- “Narcissistic abuse is cited as being ‘soul murder.’ It not only breaks your heart and crushes your spirit, but it’s directly linked to trauma wounds. Trauma pierces your core essence. It breaks you into dozens of pieces. Your trauma runs deep. Unaware, you may carry it into your adulthood.” – Dana Arcuri, Certified Trauma Recovery Coach, Soul Rescue: How to Break Free From Narcissistic Abuse & Heal Trauma
- “Oftentimes, the scapegoat feels worthless and powerless. After being beaten down, year after year, we have a strong sense of false guilt. Unconsciously, we take the narcissist’s guilt as if it were our own. As if it were our fault. As if we are deserving of mental torture and physical abuse.” – Dana Arcuri, Certified Trauma Recovery Coach, Soul Rescue: How to Break Free From Narcissistic Abuse & Heal Trauma
- “Narcissists are consumed with maintaining a shallow false self to others. They’re emotionally crippled souls that are addicted to attention. Because of this they use a multitude of games, in order to receive adoration. Sadly, they are the most ungodly of God’s creations because they don’t show remorse for their actions, take steps to make amends or have empathy for others. They are morally bankrupt.” – Shannon L. Alder
- “After the fog lifts and you awaken to the truth about abuse, the narcissist and flying monkeys will minimize the facts about what took place. They will discredit you. They will undermine your own perception. They will accuse you of being insane. Even if you took the time to explain yourself, they will cast all blame onto you.” – Dana Arcuri, Certified Trauma Recovery Coach, Soul Rescue: How to Break Free From Narcissistic Abuse & Heal Trauma
- “Two words sum up being the daughter of a narcissistic mother: deep sorrow. It was like a massive boulder sat on my chest. Choking me. Suffocating me. Drowning me. Spinning my life out of control. My memories of growing up to become an adult woman who suffered ritual narcissistic abuse had a common thread: Tears. Drama. And compounded trauma.” – Dana Arcuri, Certified Trauma Recovery Coach, Soul Rescue: How to Break Free From Narcissistic Abuse & Heal Trauma
- “The malignant narcissist has a split persona. They are like Jekyll and Hyde. One minute, they are sweet as sugar. The next minute, they fly into an uncontrollable seething rage! The narcissist loves playing mind games with you. They are clever to conceal who they are. Wherever there’s a narcissist, you can find a false mask plastered upon their face.” – Dana Arcuri, Certified Trauma Recovery Coach, Soul Rescue: How to Break Free From Narcissistic Abuse & Heal Trauma
- “The narcissistic mother is a lethal force to reckon with. If you don’t give her the flattery she craves, she will lash out at you like a rattlesnake. Unraveling, she has an emotional meltdown. She flies into a frenzy, shouting at you, bullying you, gaslighting you, and manipulating you. If she’s anything like my mother, she will victim-blame you with F-bombs flying!” – Dana Arcuri, Certified Trauma Recovery Coach, Soul Rescue: How to Break Free From Narcissistic Abuse & Heal Trauma
- “Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) causes problems in many areas of life, such as relationships, work, school or financial affairs. People with NPD may be generally unhappy and disappointed when they’re not given the special favors or admiration, which they believe they deserve. They may find their relationships unfulfilling. Others may not enjoy being around them.” – Dana Arcuri, Certified Trauma Recovery Coach, Soul Rescue: How to Break Free From Narcissistic Abuse & Heal Trauma
- “One of the first steps in freeing yourself from a gaslighting relationship, then, is to acknowledge how unpleasant and hurtful you find this Emotional Apocalypse. If you hate being yelled at, you have the right to insist that yelling not be a part of your disagreements. Maybe some other woman wouldn’t mind the loud voice, but you do. If that makes you sensitive, so be it. You have the right to set limits where you want them, not where some mythical other, “less sensitive” woman wants them.” – Robin Stern
- “One can only return to the fact that even the most ordinary, good-hearted, intelligent people are literally prone to believing the most blatantly nonsensical untruths. And this comes from the realization that there are some opinions and some beliefs so incredibly inane, we may actually on occasion feel insane for not believing them; and that is probably because in giving the benefit of the doubt we self-doubt, we convince ourselves into lame passivity and blind acceptance, we tell ourselves, ‘Maybe I’m just missing something here.” – Criss Jami, Healology
- “The family bully takes sibling rivalry to a whole new level; sibling abuse. While it’s common for families to have sibling rivalry, what stands out the most with the bully is their intent to hurt others badly, especially the family scapegoat. They can physically harm you. They will mentally torture you. In some cases, they will sexually violate you. They have evil motives to control their family members, manipulate them, and gaslight them.” – Dana Arcuri, Certified Trauma Recovery Coach, Soul Rescue: How to Break Free From Narcissistic Abuse & Heal Trauma
- “When language works to make you question your own perceptions, whether at work or at church, that’s a form of gaslighting. I first came across the term “gaslighting” in the context of abusive romantic partners, but it shows up in larger-scale relationships, too, like those between bosses and their employees, politicians and their supporters, spiritual leaders and their devotees. Across the board, gaslighting is a way of psychologically manipulating someone (or many people) such that they doubt their own reality, as a way to gain and maintain control.” – Amanda Montell, Cultish: The Language of Fanaticism
- “When a narcissist and flying monkeys see that you are onto their sly tricks, they will argue with you. This is their final attempt to find a way out of getting caught. No matter how much they scream, cuss, and fight with you, their arguments are to trip you up. They want to provoke you into more conflicts. Remember, they crave narcissistic supply. This is why they are projecting and gaslighting you. They need you to have a negative emotional reaction to them. It feeds the fuel with them. Don’t participate in the drama, denial, and dysfunction.” – Dana Arcuri, Certified Trauma Recovery Coach, Soul Rescue: How to Break Free From Narcissistic Abuse & Heal Trauma
- “While disagreements and interpersonal conflicts are common in even the healthiest of family systems, family scapegoating goes far beyond this, making recovering from its impact and effects difficult. For example, more than half of those who responded to an FSA survey I conducted have been described as “mentally ill”; “emotionally sick,” or “a liar” by a parent or other relative when there was absolutely no truth to this whatsoever. Naturally, being spoken about in this way can be confusing, angering, and even traumatizing to the target of such hostile and defamatory statements.” – Rebecca C. Mandeville, Rejected, Shamed, and Blamed: Help and Hope for Adults in the Family Scapegoat Role
- “It is not okay for someone you like to treat you poorly and then pretend it didn’t happen, making you question your own grasp on reality. This dynamic is called gaslighting. It’s a common tactic of abusers to shift the focus of the blame from their bad behavior onto the person they are victimizing. One important side effect of gaslighting is having your memory “black out” after a fight (because your brain is trying to protect you from the cruelty of the abuse), which results in not being able to remember how an argument started. You may start to internalize the idea that there is something wrong with you and that you did something to provoke the situation as you’re increasingly beaten down and confused.” – shannon weber
- “Certain relationships can just wear you down. So you mirror or reflect back- kind of like a pet, reflecting back what its master wants. This can seem easier in the moment: Whatever it takes to back this person’s vibe down. The master does not have to be male. Sometimes he is, but not always. Whoever the master is, they know this, that people can be trained. Either with praise, shame, the fear of failure, or the fear of being gaslighted, the technique is a relationship of rewards and punishments. There is no unconditional love here. No, this kind of relationship is all about the master’s conditions. Not joint respectful mutual conditions, but their conditions.” – Tori Amos, Resistance: A Songwriter’s Story of Hope, Change, and Courage
- “One of the hardest lessons I have learned social justice work is that, even when oppressive systems are confronted and dismantled, those responsible will- more often than not- take hold of the narrative to mitigate responsibility. As a result, the oppressed still tend to bear the brunt of the fallout. And what makes that even harder to process is that many people who would declare themselves “allies to the cause” will passively or actively buy into that false narrative because it is far easier and less costly than to walk in genuine solidarity. I don’t say this so that people will feel hopeless about their commitments to justice. Quite the opposite. If you know that this happens, you won’t be as crushed when it does.” – Jamie Arpin-Ricci
- “Gaslighting can be subtle and unintentional, but as feminist writer Nora Samaran explains, it is particularly insidious because it undermines people’s trust in their own capacities: “If you think of the power, the strength, the capacity to effect change that women who trust themselves are capable of, what we are losing when we doubt ourselves is an indomitable force for social change that is significant and therefore, to some, frightening. In other words, our capacity to know ourselves is immensely powerful.” All forms of oppression seem to have this tendency: racism, heteropatriarchy, ableism, ageism, colonization, and other systems of oppression contort people’s insights, experiences, and differences into weaknesses or deny them outright. For this reason, the emergence of trust can be a powerful weapon, which is being recovered all the time through struggle.” – Carla Bergman, Joyful Militancy: Building Thriving Resistance in Toxic Times
- “You all are in a hopeless bind here. Standards are inescapable. Imposed standards are inescapable. You want to pretend that this is not the case, all the while vigorously telling us how you would impose them. The funniest thing about this is that you cannot see (or will not admit) what you are doing. We (conservative Christians) have a standard, we know the basis for it, and we are willing to live by it and defend it. You [progressives] have a standard, you are willing to impose it on the rest of us, but when called upon to defend or explain your standard (and why it is authoritative over all of us), you surround yourselves with a cloud of clichés. But no society can exist unless the adherents of the worldview in power are willing to act via the law as though the adherents of various minority views are just flat wrong. Just admit that this is what you are currently doing to us. The rest of your day will be sunny and filled with epistemic relief.” – Douglas Wilson, Apologetics in the Void: Hometown Hurly-Burly
Final Thoughts
Gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse that can be hard to detect and even harder to fight against. Hopefully, these 100 gaslighting quotes will help you recognize when something is wrong in your relationships or interactions with others and give you the courage and strength to stand up for yourself. It’s important to remember that it’s never too late to stand up for yourself and speak out against emotional abuse in any form. By recognizing gaslighting, you can help to protect yourself and others who may be experiencing it. Thank you for reading!
