181+ Mean Girls Quotes to Help You Slay Your Day

If you’re like me, then you love the movie Mean Girls. It’s one of my all-time favorites! And if you’re not like me, then you should be. Because it’s amazing. And hilarious. And full of quotes that will help you make your day awesome. So without further ado, here are over 181 Mean Girls quotes to help you out!

Mean Girls Quotes

1. “Grool.”
2. “I’m a mouse, duh.”
3. “Is butter a carb?”
4. “It’s October 3rd.”
5. “You can’t sit with us!”
6. “She doesn’t even go here!”
7. “The limit does not exist.”
8. “Damn Africa, what happened?”
9. “She made out with a hot dog.”
10. “You smell like a baby prostitute.”
11. “Your face smells like peppermint!”
12. “Fine! You can walk home, bitches.”
13. “Get in loser. We’re going shopping.”
14. “Whatever, I’m getting cheese fries.”
15. “Everyone in Africa can read Swedish.”
16. “Oh, hi. Did you wanna buy some drugs?”
17. “That was so fetch.” – Gretchen Wieners
18. “I have really bad breath in the morning.”
19. “I hear she does car commercials…in Japan.”
20. “On Wednesdays we wear pink.” – Karen Smith
21. “Oh my god, Danny DeVito! I love your work!”
22. “I’m not like a regular mom. I’m a cool mom.”
23. “Four for you, Glenn Coco! You go, Glenn Coco!”
24.  “I want to lose three pounds.” — Regina George
25. “Coach Carr, step away from the underage girls!”
26. “I can’t go out tonight. I’m sick.” –Karen Smith
27. “Regina, you’re wearing sweatpants. It’s Monday.”
28. Get in loser, we’re going shopping. — Regina George
29. “Four for you Glen Coco! You go, Glen Coco!” – Damian
30. All you sucka MCs ain’t got nothing on me.” — Kevin G.
31. “‘Cause she’s a life ruiner. She ruins people’s lives.”
32. “I don’t hate you cuz yo’ fat… yo’ fat cuz I hate you!”
33. “One time, she punched me in the face. It was awesome.”
34. “Made out with a hot dog? Oh my God, that was one time!”
35. “You wanna do something fun? You wanna go to Taco Bell?”
36. “Did you see nipple? It only counts if you saw a nipple!”
37. “So that’s against the rules, and you can’t sit with us.”
38. I’m not like a regular mom, I’m a cool mom! — Mrs. George
39. “And I want my pink shirt back! I want my pink shirt back!”
40. “That’s why her hair is so big. It’s full of secrets.” – Damian
41. “We only carry sizes one, three, and five. You could try Sears.”
42. That is the ugliest effing skirt I’ve ever seen. — Regina George
43. Damn. I’d rather see you out there shakin’ that thang. — Kevin G.
44. Did you see a nipple? It only counts if you saw a nipple. — Jason
45. “Make sure you check out her mom’s boob job. They’re hard as rocks!”
46. “One time she punched me in the face. It was awesome.” – Bethany Byrd
47. Hell, no. I did not leave the South Side for this! — Principal Duvall
48. “Looks like he’s headed for the projection room above the auditorium!”
49. “Gretchen, stop trying to make fetch happen. It’s not going to happen!”
50. “How many of you have ever felt personally victimized by Regina George?”
51. Grool. I meant to say cool but then I started to say great. — Cady Heron
52. It’s not my fault you’re, like, in love with me or something! — Cady Heron
53. It’s not my fault I have a heavy flow and a wide-set vagina! — Bethany Byrd
54. “But you’re, like, really pretty… So you agree? You think you’re really pretty?”
55. “I know I may seem like a bitch, but that’s only because I’m acting like a bitch.”
56. “Regina George is not sweet! She’s a scum-sucking road whore, she ruined my life!”
57. “I can’t go to Taco Bell. I’m on an all-carb diet. God, Karen, you are so stupid!”
58. “I’m sorry that people are so jealous of me. But I can’t help it that I’m popular.”
59. “Can I get you guys anything? Some snacks? A condom? Let me know! Oh, God love ya.”
60. “I’m sorry I called you a gap-toothed bitch. It’s not your fault you’re so gap-toothed.”
61. “I saw Cady Heron wearing Army pants and flip-flops, so I bought Army pants and flip-flops.”
62. “Oh, I love seeing teachers outside of school. It’s like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs.”
63. “Raise your hand if you have ever been personally victimized by Regina George.” – Ms. Norbury
64. “Your hair looks so sexy pushed back. Cady, will you please tell him his hair looks sexy pushed back.”
65. “I’m sorry that people are so jealous of me, but I can’t help it that I’m popular.” – Gretchen Wieners
66. “I just wanted to say that you’re all winners. And that I couldn’t be happier the school year is ending.”
67. My breasts can always tell when it’s going to rain. Well, they can tell when it’s raining.” – Karen Smith
68. Almost as mad as I get when I think about the fact that my sister named him Anfernee.” — Principal Duvall
69. I know I may seem like I was being a bitch, but that’s only because I was acting like a bitch. — Cady Heron
70. “Irregardless, ex-boyfriends are just off-limits to friends. I mean that’s just like the rules of feminism.”
71. “I don’t know why. It’s probably because I have a big, fat LESBIAN crush on you. Suck on that! Aye aye aye!”
72. “Irregardless, ex-boyfriends are off-limits to friends. That’s just, like, the rules of feminism.” –Gretchen Wieners
73. “I used to think there was just fat and skinny. But apparently there’s lots of things that can be wrong on your body.”
74. “I know she’s kind of socially retarded and weird, but she’s my friend… so, just promise me you won’t make fun of her!”
75. “I don’t think my father, the inventor of Toaster Strudel, would be too pleased to hear about this.” – Gretchen Wieners
76. “Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it.”
77. “It’s like I have ESPN or something. My breasts can always tell when it’s going to rain. Well… they can tell when it’s raining.”
78. “And on the third day, God created the Remington bolt-action rifle, so that Man could fight the dinosaurs. And the homosexuals.”
79. So, you’ve actually never been to a real school before? Shut up! Shut up! — Regina George,,”I didn’t say anything.” — Cady Heron
80. You can’t sit with us!’ — Gretchen Wieners
81. Gretchen, stop trying to make *fetch* happen. It’s not going to happen!” — Regina George
82. Who are The Plastics? — Cady Heron,,”They’re teen royalty. If North Shore was Us Weekly, they would be always on the cover.” — Damian
83. Damian: [guarding Cady down the hall] Watch out, please! Fresh meat coming through! Damian: Watch out, please! Fresh meat coming through!
84. “This is Susan from Planned Parenthood. I have her test results. If you could have her call me as soon as she can? It’s urgent. Thank you!”
85. “There are two kinds of evil people in this world. Those who do evil stuff and those who see evil stuff being done and don’t try to stop it.”
86. “If you’re from Africa, why are you white?” – Karen Smith,,“Oh my god Karen, you can’t just ask people why they’re white.” – Gretchen Wieners
87. Brutus is just as smart as Caesar, people totally like Brutus as much as they like Caesar. WE SHOULD TOTALLY JUST STAB CAESAR!” – Gretchen Wieners
88. “Half the people in this room are mad at me, and the other half only like me because they think I pushed somebody in front a bus, so that’s not good.”
89. “Did you have an awesome time? Did you drink awesome shooters, listen to awesome music, and then just sit around and soak up each other’s awesomeness?”
90. “I will keep you here all night.” – Principal Duvall,,“We can’t keep them past four.” – Secretary,,“I will keep you here ’til four.” – Principal Duvall
91. Cady Heron: Hey! Karen Smith: (Shocked, startled, and scared) Why are dressed so scary? Karen Smith: Why are dressed so scary? Cady Heron: It’s Halloween.
92. Mr. Duvall: Miss Smith? Karen Smith: Whoever wrote it probably didn’t think anyone would ever see it? Mr. Duvall: I hope that nobody else ever does see it.
93. “Don’t have sex. Because you will get pregnant, and die. Don’t have sex in the missionary position, don’t have sex standing up, just… don’t do it. Promise?”
94. So, uh… how was your summer? — Principal Duvall,,”I got divorced.” — Ms. Norbury,,”Oh. My carpal tunnel came back.” — Principal Duvall,,”I win.” — Ms. Norbury
95. “I wish we could all get along like we used to in middle school. I wish I could bake a cake filled with rainbows and smiles and everyone would eat and be happy.”
96. “Gretchen, I’m sorry I laughed at you that time you got diarrhea at Barnes & Noble. And I’m sorry for telling everyone about it. And I’m sorry for repeating it now.”
97. “Somebody wrote in that book that I’m lying about being a virgin, ’cause I use super-jumbo tampons, but I can’t help it if I’ve got a heavy flow and a wide-set vagina!”
98. You wanna do something fun? You wanna go to Taco Bell? — Karen Smith,,“I can’t go to Taco Bell. I’m on an all-carb diet. God, Karen, you are so stupid!” – Regina George
99. Don’t have sex. Because you will get pregnant, and die. Don’t have sex in the missionary position, don’t have sex standing up, just…don’t do it. Promise? — Coach Carr
100. “I hate her! I mean, she’s really failing me on purpose, just because I didn’t join the stupid Mathletes! She was so queer, she was like, ‘I’m pusher Cady, I’m a pusher.’”
101. “I have a nephew named Anfernee, and I know how mad he gets when I call him Anthony. Almost as mad as I get when I think about the fact that my sister named him Anfernee.”
102. Gretchen, I’m sorry I laughed at you that time you got diarrhea at Barnes & Noble. And I’m sorry for telling everyone about it. And I’m sorry for repeating it now. — Karen Smith
103. Why were you talking to Janis Ian? — Regina George,,”I don’t know, I mean, she’s so weird, she just, you know, came up to me and started talking to me about crack.” — Cady Heron
104. “At your age, you’re going to have a lot of urges. You’re going to want to take off your clothes and touch each other. But if you do touch each other, you will get chlamydia… and die.”
105. She’s a life ruiner. She ruins people’s lives.” — Janis Ian
106. Is your muffin buttered?” — Jason,,”What?” — Cady Heron,,”Would you like us to assign someone to butter your muffin?” — Jason
107. “I wish we could all get along like we used to in middle school. I wish I could bake a cake filled with rainbows and smiles and everyone would eat and be happy.” – Girl Who Doesn’t Go to the School
108. In the real world, Halloween is when kids dress up and beg for candy. But in girl world, Halloween is the one time of year a girl can dress like a total slut and no other girl can say anything about it. — Cady Heron
109. “I mean no offense, but how could she send you a candy cane? She doesn’t even like you that much. Maybe she feels weird around me because I’m the only person who knows about her nose job. Oh my god, pretend you didn’t hear that.”
110. “If only you knew how mean she really is, you’d know that I’m not allowed to wear hoop earrings, right? Yeah, two years ago she told me hoops earrings were her thing, and I wasn’t allowed to wear them anymore. And then for Hanukkah, my parents got this pair of really expensive white gold hoops and I had to pretend like I didn’t even like them. It was so sad.”
111. You know that I’m not allowed to wear hoop earrings, right? Yeah, two years ago she told me hoops earrings were her thing, and I wasn’t allowed to wear them anymore. And then for Hanukkah my parents got this pair of really expensive white gold hoops and I had to pretend like I didn’t even like them. It was so sad.” — Gretchen Wieners
112. Made out with a hotdog? Oh my God, that was one time!” — Amber
113. “Why should Caesar get to stomp around like a giant, while the rest of us try not to get smushed under his big feet? What’s so great about Caesar? Hmm? Brutus is just as cute as Caesar. Brutus is just as smart as Caesar. People totally like Brutus just as much as they like Caesar. And when did it become okay for one person to be the boss of everybody, huh? Because that’s not what Rome is about. We should totally just stab Caesar!”
114. Karen Smith: You know who’s looking fine tonight? Seth Mosakowski. Gretchen Weiners: You did not just say that. Karen Smith: Why? He’s a good kisser. Gretchen Weiners: He is your cousin! Karen Smith: Yeah, but he’s my first cousin. Gretchen Weiners: Right. Karen Smith: So you have your cousins, and you have your first cousins, and you have your second cousins… Gretchen Weiners: No, honey. Uh-uh. Karen Smith: That’s not right, is it? Gretchen Weiners: That is so not right.
115. “She’s so pathetic. Let me tell you something about Janis Ian. We were best friends in middle school. I know, right? It’s so embarrassing. I don’t even… Whatever. So then in eighth grade, I started going out with my first boyfriend Kyle who was totally gorgeous but then he moved to Indiana, and Janis was like, weirdly jealous of him. Like, if I would blow her off to hang out with Kyle, she’d be like, “Why didn’t you call me back?” And I’d be like, ‘Why are you so obsessed with me?’”Related: ‘As If!’ 55+ Of The Best ‘Clueless’ Quotes That Will Bring You Back to the ’90s

Mean Girls Quotes Said by Regina George

1. “Boo, you whore.” – Regina George
2. “God, Karen, you are so stupid.” – Regina George
3. “Because that vest was disgusting!” – Regina George
4. “I love her; she’s like a martian!” – Regina George
5. “Get in, loser. We’re going shopping.” – Regina George
6. “Aren’t you so mad at Gretchen for telling me?” – Regina George
7. “I mean, I couldn’t have a lesbian at my party.” – Regina George
8. ““So you agree, you think you’re really pretty.”” – Regina George
9. “That is the ugliest f-ing skirt I’ve ever seen.” – Regina George
10. “Then it’s settled, so you can go shave your back now.” – Regina George
11. “And right now, you’re getting on my last nerve! Switch!” – Regina George
12. “Cady, will you please tell him his hair looks sexy pushed back?” – Regina George
13. “Gretchen, stop trying to make fetch happen. It’s not going to happen.” – Regina George
14. “I know she’s kind of socially retarded and weird, but she’s my friend.” – Regina George
15. “They say you’re a homeschooled jungle freak who is a less hot version of me.” – Regina George
16. “Oh, this is Susan from Planned Parenthood. I have her test results; if you could have her give me a call as soon as she can, it’s urgent; thank you.” – Regina George
17. “Gretchen told me you like Aaron Samuels. I mean, I don’t care, do whatever you want, but lemme just tell you something about Aaron, all he cares about is school and his mom and his friends.” – Regina George

Mean Girls Quotes Said by Gretchen Weiners

1. “That’s so fetch.” – Gretchen Weiners (Mean Girls)
2. “You can’t sit with us!” – Gretchen Weiners (Mean Girls)
3. “Dawn Schweitzer is a fat virgin.” – Gretchen Weiners (Mean Girls)
4. “Oh, it’s like slang, from… England.” – Gretchen Weiners (Mean Girls)
5. “Trang Pak is a grotsky, little byotch.” – Gretchen Weiners (Mean Girls)
6. “Oh my god, Karen, you can’t just ask people why they’re white.” – Gretchen Weiners (Mean Girls)
7. “Make sure you check out her mom’s boob job. They’re hard as rocks.” – Gretchen Weiners (Mean Girls)
8. “Oh no, I can’t say anything else until I have a parent or lawyer present.” – Gretchen Weiners (Mean Girls)
9. “I’m sorry that people are so jealous of me. But I can’t help it that I’m popular.” – Gretchen Weiners (Mean Girls)
10. “And you can only wear your hair in a ponytail once a week, so I guess you chose today.” – Gretchen Weiners (Mean Girls)
11. “Well, I mean you wouldn’t buy a skirt without asking your friends first if it looks good on you.” – Gretchen Weiners (Mean Girls)
12. “I mean, no offense, but why would she send you a candy cane? She doesn’t even like you that much.” – Gretchen Weiners (Mean Girls)
13. “Irregardless! Ex-boyfriends are just off limits to friends. I mean, that’s just like, the rules of feminism!” – Gretchen Weiners (Mean Girls)
14. “Maybe she feels weird around me because I’m the only person who knows about her nose job. Oh my god, pretend you didn’t hear that.” – Gretchen Weiners (Mean Girls)
15. “And did you know she cheats on Aaron? Yes, every Thursday he thinks she’s doing SAT Prep but really she’s hooking up with Shane Oman in the projection room above the auditorium. And I never told anyone because… I was such a good friend.” – Gretchen Weiners (Mean Girls)
16. “Why should Caesar just get to stomp around like a giant while the rest of us try not to get smushed under his big feet? Brutus is just as cute as Caesar, right? Brutus is just as smart as Caesar, people totally like Brutus just as much as they like Caesar, and when did it become okay for one person to be the boss of everybody because that’s not what Rome is about! We should totally just STAB CAESAR!” – Gretchen Weiners (Mean Girls)
17. “If only you knew how to mean she really is… You’d know that I’m not allowed to wear hoop earrings, right? Yeah! Two years ago she told me hoops earrings were *her* thing and I wasn’t allowed to wear them anymore. And then for Hannakuh my parents got this pair of really expensive white gold hoops and I had to pretend like I didn’t even like them and… it was so sad. And you know she cheats on Aaron? Yes, every Thursday he thinks she’s doing SAT prep but really she’s hooking up with Shane Oman in the projection room above the auditorium! I never told anybody that because I am *such* a good friend!” – Gretchen Weiners (Mean Girls)

Mean Girls Quotes Said by Karen Smith

1. “I’m a MOUSE. DUH.” – Karen Smith (Mean Girls)
2. “My nail beds suck.” – Karen Smith (Mean Girls)
3. “What? He’s a good kisser.” – Karen Smith (Mean Girls)
4. “On Wednesdays we wear pink!” – Karen Smith (Mean Girls)
5. “Oh my God, you’re so skinny!” – Karen Smith (Mean Girls)
6. “Oh my god, she’s so annoying.” – Karen Smith (Mean Girls)
7. “Why are you dressed so scary?” – Karen Smith (Mean Girls)
8. “They were real that day I wore a vest!” – Karen Smith (Mean Girls)
9. “If you’re from Africa, why are you white?” – Karen Smith (Mean Girls)
10. “Well… I’m kinda psychic. I have a fifth sense.” – Karen Smith (Mean Girls)
11. “There’s a 30% chance that it’s already raining!” – Karen Smith (Mean Girls)
12. “I can stick my whole fist in my mouth! Wanna see?” – Karen Smith (Mean Girls)
13. “No, I am actually. I’m failing almost everything!” – Karen Smith (Mean Girls)
14. “Do you wanna do something fun? Wanna go to taco bell?” – Karen Smith (Mean Girls)
15. “Gretchen, I’m sorry I laughed at you that time you got diarrhea at Barnes & Nobles.” – Karen Smith (Mean Girls)
16. “It’s like I have ESPN or something. My breasts can always tell when it’s going to rain.” – Karen Smith (Mean Girls)

Mean Girls Quotes Said by Cady Heron 

1. “Did you just say “thang”?” – Cady Heron (Mean Girls)
2. “Everyone in Africa knows Swedish.” – Cady Heron (Mean Girls)
3. “Yeah, he’s almost too gay to function.” – Cady Heron (Mean Girls)
4. “Grool… I meant to say cool and then I started to say great.” – Cady Heron (Mean Girls)
5. “Ms. Norbury had us write out apologies to people we’d hurt in our lifes.” – Cady Heron (Mean Girls)
6. “You know what! It’s not my fault you’re like, in love with me, or something!” – Cady Heron (Mean Girls)
7. “I have this theory, that if you cut off all her hair she’d look like a British man.” – Cady Heron (Mean Girls)
8. “Regina said she’ll talk to Aaron. And now she is. How can Janis hate her? She’s such a good… SLUT!” – Cady Heron (Mean Girls)
9. “And they have this book, this burn book, where they write mean things about all the girls in our grade.” – Cady Heron (Mean Girls)
10. “It’s 40 percent. Well 48 over 120 equals X over 100 and then you cross multiply and get the value of X.” – Cady Heron (Mean Girls)
11. “I don’t know, I mean, she’s so weird, she just, you know, came up to me and started talking to me about crack.” – Cady Heron (Mean Girls)
12. “I used to think there was just fat and skinny. But apparently, there’s lots of things that can be wrong on your body.” – Cady Heron (Mean Girls)
13. “Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it.” – Cady Heron (Mean Girls)
14. “Half the people in this room are mad at me, and the other half only like me because they think I pushed somebody in front a bus, so that’s not good.” – Cady Heron (Mean Girls)
15. “Calling somebody else fat won’t make you any skinnier. Calling someone stupid doesn’t make you any smarter. And ruining Regina George’s life definitely didn’t make me any happier. All you can do in life is try to solve the problem in front of you.” – Cady Heron (Mean Girls)
16. “And that’s how Regina George died. No, I’m totally kidding. But she did get hurt. Some girls say they saw her head go all the way around. But that’s just a rumor. Some people swear they saw me Push her in front of the bus. That was an even worse rumor.” – Cady Heron (Mean Girls)
17. “Same with Gretchen: the meaner Regina was to her, the more Gretchen tried to win Regina back. She knew it was better to be in the plastics, hating life, than to not be in at all. Because being with the plastics was like being famous… people looked at you all the time and everybody just knew stuff about you.” – Cady Heron (Mean Girls)

Wrapping Up

We hope you enjoyed reading through these Mean Girls quotes! If you’re a fan of the movie (or just appreciate a good burn), be sure to share this post with your friends. And if you have any favorite Mean Girls quotes that we missed, drop them in the comments below!

Until next time, stay fetch. xoxo