If you’re looking for a good laugh, look no further than these 55 stoner quotes about weed, life, and love! These hilarious quotes perfectly capture the laid-back nature of stoners. Whether you’re looking to pair your favorite strain with a wise quote, or just feel like reflecting on life’s simple pleasures, these quotes are sure to bring a smile.
Stoner Quotes
- “It’s hard to be mean when you’re stoned.” — Bill Lee
- “Everything is better with a bag of weed.” — Stewie Griffin
- “The only thing better than smoking weed is having someone to smoke it with.” — Unknown
- “Life is like a bowl of cannabis: Enjoy it.” – Bob Marley
- “When in doubt, smoke some weed and avoid the route of self-doubt.” – Unknown
- “My attitude is based on how much weed I’ve smoked that day.” – Snoop Dogg
- “If you can’t beat them, get high with them.” – Unknown
- “Cannabis makes me feel more creative and less stressed out.” – Wiz Khalifa
- “Sometimes the best way to solve a problem is to smoke it away.” — Snoop Dogg
- “Life isn’t about finding yourself, it’s about creating yourself. And a little bit of weed helps.” — Unknown
- “Smoking weed makes the mundane more interesting.” – Unknown
- “Weed is like a beautiful woman; it’s better when you share it.” – Unknown
- “Smoke weed, not cigarettes. Your lungs will thank you later.” – Unknown
- “The true measure of friendship isn’t how well you know someone, but how well you smoke together.” – Unknown
- “Struggle is the enemy, but weed is the remedy.” — Kid Cudi
- “When you smoke the herb, it reveals you to yourself.” — Bob Marley
- “I don’t think [pot] is more dangerous than alcohol.” — Barack Obama
- “Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction.” — Bob Marley
- “Smoke the marijuana and get high. Stay above the wicked and fly.” — Snoop Dogg
- “A marijuana high can enhance core human mental abilities.” — Sebastian Marincolo
- “Let us burn one from end to end, and pass it over to me, my friend.” — Ben Harper
- “I smoke two joints before I smoke two joints. And then I smoke two more.” — Sublime
- “If somebody gives me a joint, I might smoke it, but I don’t go after it.” — John Lennon
- “I think pot should be legal. I don’t smoke it, but I like the smell of it.” — Andy Warhol
- “Please don’t throw your shit at me…unless that shit resembles a bag of marijuana.” — Les Claypool
- “Marijuana is not a drug!!! I used to suck dick for coke! You ever suck DICK for marijuana?” — Bob Saget
- “I find it quite ironic that the most dangerous thing about getting weed is getting caught with it.” — Bill Murray
- “The biggest killer on the planet is stress, and I still think the best medicine is and always has been cannabis.” — Willie Nelson
- “?Some of my finest hours have been spent on my back veranda, smoking hemp and observing as far as my eye can see.” — Thomas Jefferson
- “Is marijuana addictive? Yes, in the sense that most of the really pleasant things in life are worth endlessly repeating.” — Richard Neville
- “Why is marijuana against the law? It grows naturally upon our planet. Doesn’t the idea of making nature against the law seem to you a bit… unnatural?” — Bill Hicks
- “It really puzzles me to see marijuana connected with narcotics… dope and all that crap. It’s a thousand times better than whiskey — it’s an assistant — a friend.” — Louis Armstrong
- “The illegality of cannabis is outrageous, an impediment to full utilization of a drug which helps produce the serenity and insight, sensitivity, and fellowship so desperately needed in this increasingly mad and dangerous world.” — Carl Sagan
- “I’d always done a lot of sniffing glue as a kid. I was very interested in glue, and then I went to lager and speed, and I drifted into heroin because as a kid growing up everybody told me, ‘don’t smoke marijuana, it will kill you.’” — Irvine Welsh
- “I have always loved marijuana. It has been a source of joy and comfort to me for many years. And I still think of it as a basic staple of life, along with beer and ice and grapefruits — and millions of Americans agree with me.” — Hunter S. Thompson
- “Love is like a good joint, it hits you when you least expect it.” – Unknown
- “Smoking weed doesn’t make you lazy; it just makes everything else seem less important.” – Unknown
- “Weed can turn an ordinary day into an extraordinary one.” — Unknown
- “The best way to reduce stress is to spark up a joint.” — Unknown
- “Smoke weed, not war.” – Unknown
- “If life gives you lemons, smoke some weed and make lemonade!” – Unknown
- “Let’s get high, stay low, and laugh at life’s follies.” – Unknown
- “Weed is the only thing that cures my anxiety.” – Unknown
- “Some days are better high.” – Unknown
- “Smoke and chill, it’s a stress reliever.” – Unknown
- “I don’t have time for the haters. I’m too busy getting higher.” – Unknown
- “She loves me, she loves me not; pass me the bong and I’ll forget.” – Unknown
- “If life is a party, weed is the punchline.” – Unknown
- “Weed makes life so much cooler.” – Unknown
- “Smoke it if you got it!” – Unknown
- “The best way to make friends is with a bowl of herb.” – Unknown
- “Life is short, smoke more weed.” – Unknown
- “The only way to deal with stress is to take a hit of that good stuff!” – Unknown
- “Weed makes everything better, even the worst days.” – Unknown
- “Sometimes you just need a puff to get through it all.” – Unknown
Wrapping Up
If you’re looking for a good laugh, look no further than these 60 stoner quotes about weed, life, and love! These hilarious quotes perfectly capture the laid-back nature of stoners. Whether you’re looking to pair your favorite strain with a wise quote, or just feel like reflecting on life’s simple pleasures, these quotes are sure to bring a smile. What is your favorite stoner quote? Share it in the comments below!